Kourtney & Kim Take New York Season Premiere Rekap: You're My Wife Now!

The second, scripted season of Kourtney & Kim Take New York kicked off last night, and was impossible to take at face value, given the drama of the past few months.

Because of the overexposure of Kourtney and Kim Kardashian, and the demise of her marriage to Kris Humphries, every scene of this nonsense takes on new meaning.

That said, let's break down the season premiere, THG plus-minus style, as we run down the many signs that Kim's fake marriage was headed for a 72-day flame out:

Hilariously, the show kicks off with celebrity gossip magazine covers and TV reports discussing the end of their union, weeks before Kim actually left him. Plus 19.

"You're my wife now. It's going to take a lot to get rid of me." - Kris. LOL. Dude, these are shameless, overly made-up phonies do whatever the hell they want and it's all for ratings. You really think you matter to them? Could you not see this coming? Did you not Google your wife or read ANY celebrity news site? Minus 50.

Kim and Kris call each other "husband" and "wifey." AWWWW! Plus 5.

Living together? Not so cute. They had never done so before, and it shows, as Kim like things neater than Kris, who could really give a f--k. "When I see a messy room, it literally ruins my day," Kim says. Literally. Minus 28.

"I can't live with Kris," she says to her sister. "He's such a slob." Good thing she found out they were incompatible before they got married! Oh wait. Minus 31.

The producers set Kris up for a nervous breakdown, and while we feel bad for the guy, it's a lot of fun to watch at times. Like when he arrives home to find Kourtney doing nude yoga with a naked dude and a few other girls. Plus 30.

Kourt tries to fake apologize for the scripted setup. Why bother? Minus 4.

"I'm excited to be Mason's uncle." - Kris. Plus 5, because he was probably sincere, but once again, E! made him live with the kid, in an adjacent room no less.

"It's important to me that Kris bonds with Mason. He's going to be a really good dad someday." - Kim Kardashian. Read: Just not with my kids. Minus 12.

As Kim bitches about "career" obligations, Kris observes, “Baby, by the time you have kids, no one will probably care about you.” Plus 125, because that probably sealed the divorce right there. Don't ever call her irrelevant!

At a welcome to New York party thrown in Kim and Kris' honor, the latter obviously does not want to be there. Plus 8 for the fact that this makes Kris more human to us, but Minus 17, because what did he expect here?

"You care about that. I don't give a f--k." - Kris, re: everything. Plus 14.

We forgot Scott Disick is also on this show. What a douche. Minus 40.

Despite playing for the New Jersey Nets (he's now a free agent) last year, Kris does not really like New York! "It's hard getting adjusted," he says. "Everything in New York is screwing me up." Namely his INSANE new in-laws. Plus 10.

And then the bomb: "I love you so much," he tells Kim, before peacing out of NYC to train in his native Minnesota. Shades of things to come. Minus 15.

Kim notes, in a moment of reflection, as if she's trying to convince herself, that "I should definitely be supportive of my husband." Yes you should. And enter into marriage for the right reasons and actually work hard on it. Minus 75.

She appreciates that Kris supports her career, whatever that is. Minus 12.

Kris tucks her in bed like he did the first time E! told him to when they first started dating and tells Kim he is grateful to get the hell out loves her. Plus 7.

An online petition calling for E! to cancel this krap has more than 168,000 signers. After this hour, you can make it 168,001. Plus 13 for starting that.

EPISODE TOTAL: -59.

Source: http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/2011/11/kourtney-and-kim-take-new-york-season-premiere-rekap-youre-my-wi/

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Doris Day still sings at 87, offers fans "My Heart" (Reuters)

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) ? At age 87, Doris Day is not exactly pop music's latest hot young artist. But this week the star of film, TV and music returns to the U.S. record world she conquered more than 60 years ago with a new album, "My Heart."

The CD, which hits record stores and websites December 2, is filled with old standards like "My Buddy," previously unreleased tunes such as "Stewball," about a race horse Day loved, and pop hits of the 1960s and '70s such as "Daydream" and "You Are So Beautiful."

"I like the music when I was working and singing," she told Reuters. "I think the writers were so incredibly brilliant, and when you sang a song of theirs that you loved, it really meant something. And love songs, I love love songs."

Day, whose first hit was 1945's "Sentimental Journey," went from big band singer to movie star of the 1950s and '60s. She became the quintessential All-American girl and a major box office draw with films such as "Calamity Jane" and "Pillow Talk," opposite Rock Hudson. In the late 1960s, she moved to TV where she starred in "The Doris Day Show."

But after that show ended in 1973, Day stepped out of the Hollywood limelight, moved to California's Central Coast and devoted herself to helping animals through various charitable groups, including the Doris Day Animal Foundation.

For the most part, she has stayed away from entertainment circles for more than 20 years since accepting a lifetime achievement honor from Golden Globe organizers in 1989.

Day recorded and released the songs for "My Heart" because she wanted to help animals -- sales proceeds go to her animal foundation -- and she dedicated the song "My Buddy" to her son, the late record producer and songwriter Terry Melcher, who died in 2004 after battling melanoma.

"He really was my buddy," Day said of her son. "I wanted that song to be there because it was for him and, well, all I can say is that I miss him very much."

PICKING SONGS SHE LIKES

Day's voice is sharp on songs such as "My One and Only Love" and "The Way I Dreamed It," and she says she picked the songs for the album simply because she liked them.

"It's difficult to explain," she said. "You pick the songs that you like and like a lot."

She agreed that she's lived a magical life -- from Ohio schoolgirl to Hollywood star -- but then remembered that not all was sunshine and sweetness.

While her years in music, movies and TV will be known for performing, Day's setbacks notably included being left deeply in debt after one husband and his business partner squandered her earnings. Still, she recovered.

"I had a lot of bumps, but each one led me to something better," she said.

Of all her endeavors, Day said she loved singing the most -- singing and the movies equally, on second thought. Of her favorite memories, she said, are those when she first became a singer in a big band with a swinging sound.

"My Heart" already has been released in Great Britain, and it landed in the top 10 on U.K. record charts, making Day among the oldest singers ever to earn that achievement.

Day said she thinks the key to her longevity is "laughing a lot ... My entire family has gone to heaven, so I'm all alone. But if I sat in my house and cried all the time, what kind of life would that be?"

She ends the album with the song "Ohio" -- a musical reference to the state where she was born, with its classic lyrics "Why, O why, O why-o//why did I ever leave Ohio?"

Day said she's not really sure exactly why she left home so many years ago, except that she simply loved to sing.

"I was going to marry a very nice man," she said. "I was going to have a nice little house and cook for him."

She pauses to reflect.

"I still don't cook," she said, then laughs.

(Editing by Sheri Linden)

Source: http://us.rd.yahoo.com/dailynews/rss/movies/*http%3A//news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20111127/en_nm/us_dorisday

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